The Scruffy Looking Nerf-Herder Saves The Day
by NotMarge
Summary: Brooke desperately needs a hero. Is Nick it? 11 Years post Before We Go.


I do not own Before We Go.

I have owned lice tho. Ugh.

The Nerd-Herder Saves the Day

* * *

Brooke screamed so loud and terrified Nick truly thought someone or something had possibly died.

He dropped his phone, launching up out of the easy chair.

And sprinted in the direction of the shriek.

He found them in the bathroom, her and Lily.

Six year old Lily, with her blond hair and blue eyes, an almost perfect mini-Brooke, cowering in bewilderment and a little fear.

And her mother standing in front of her, staring horror-struck at her hand.

"What?!" Nick gasped out. "What's going on?"

His wife of ten years didn't respond.

Well, not exactly.

Only remained nearly catatonic with revulsion.

Nick took a couple of steps further in the room, leaning over his petite wife's shoulder to solve the mystery of the blood-curdling scream.

A tiny pale buggish looking thing was crawling on her forefinger.

A louse.

"Okay," Nick Vaugh declared, somewhat relieved. "Alright."

Reaching over, he snatched a square from the toliet paper hanger, captured the insect from the pad of his wife's forefinger.

Threw it in the toliet bowl.

And flushed.

"All gone," he announced lightly.

The entire interaction had taken about twenty five seconds.

As if the rushing water had broken some sort of spell cast over her, Brooke looked toward her daughter.

Then back to her husband.

"I was just brushing her hair and there it was on my hand! She's _covered_ with them!"

Nick nodded.

"Yep. Okay. Lily, honey," he directed his daughter. "Get in the tub and sit down."

She looked confused.

"Without any water? With my clothes on?"

He grinned at her.

"Yep."

She sat and Nick turned to his wife.

"Brooke, go to the store and get the lice treatment."

His lovely blond haired wife stared at him, mouth opening and closing in distress.

"Brooke," Nick said gently, taking her by the shoulders and leaning down to look in her big, beautiful, blue eyes. "It's okay. It's just lice. Go."

* * *

As the front door closed, Nick turned to his wide-eyed offspring.

"Is Mommy okay?"

Nick scrunched up his face in a 'sure, sweetie,' and shrugged his shoulders.

"Yeah, she just hates bugs."

 _Like really, really hates them._

 _Like atomic_ bomb _hates them._

* * *

Andy got up an hour later (Nick, elbow deep in a licey daughter, didn't know how the child had managed to sleep through his mother's screaming in the first place), scratching his head and complaining of ants in his bed.

And Brooke, nearly on the edge of fainting, dug her fingernails into her husband's arm so tight, he flinched.

But he kept a lid on it.

Tight.

And took another deep breath.

"Okay, alright, okay. We got this."

He held up his hands in a soothing gesture.

"Everybody just chill."

* * *

". . . nerf herder!"

As Princess Leia began the first many ire-filled attacks to Han Solo's apparent 'nerf-herder' infused character, Lily piped up with the next logical question.

"Mommy, what's a 'nerf herder'?"

Her mother cast a now much calmer gaze down at her precious little daughter.

And frowned in concentration.

"She's . . . she's kinda calling him a jerk."

Exchanging meaningful glances with her husband of ten years.

 _I'm so sorry, baby._

 _Eleven years, Brooke, let it go._

There they were, the whole family, all four of them, hunkered down on the dark leather couch in the living room.

Little Lily, Nick's own personal human equivalent of sunshine, bright yellow shower cap atop her goo-covered, lice infested blond tresses.

Andy, four year old head, with a green . . .

"Green like boogers, Lily!"

. . . shower cap covering his freshly shaven head.

Their two children. So precious. So kind.

"Okay, then. Andy's a total nerf-herder."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am not!"

Most of the time.

* * *

Mother, daughter, son, father.

Buckled up all safe and sound in the car.

At their local Dairy Queen.

Mom Brooke was slightly less than thrilled at her husband's choice of venue.

"Nick, this food is really unhealthy for the kids."

To which the driver of the car, shook his lice-free head dismissively.

His pink shower capped, lice-free head.

"Oh, we're in crisis mode here, Brooke. And there's only one cure for it!"

"More cowbell?" she answered slyly.

He grinned fondly at her even as the kids shouted from the back seat excitedly.

"Ice cream!"

She self-consciously adjusted her own light blue shower cap as they crept slowly behind a big Ford "Fat Boyz" truck.

Her knight in shining armor reached out to take said hand and brought it to his bearded lips.

"I love you, Brooke."

She smiled sheepishly.

"I love you, N-"

He interrupted to her with a devilish gleam in his eye.

"You're so beautiful in your shower cap."

Her lovely face blossomed beet-red as she exploded into embarrassed laughter.

"Nick!" she gasped as she slapped at his arm.

Their delicious, delectable, delightful ice cream orders taken by the faceless speaker voice of the Dairy Queeen god, he edged the car up to the window as it opened.

"Excuse me, miss," he called into the establishment. "Would you help me, please? She's abusing me out here!"

Brooke screeched again, her formerly drawn face alight with joy.

"No, I'm not! He has lice!"

Nick turned to her, pleasantly surprised at her outburst.

"No, I don't! This is a fashion statement!"

Neither sentence was true.

Nick Vaughn was neither a fashionista nor riddled with creepy crawlies.

He simply wanted to deflect some of the embarrassment and shame of the lice-stigma away from his children.

And so had proudly donned the pink showercap . . .

"Daddy, pink is a _girl's_ color!"

"No, it's not! Many guys like pink. I _love_ pink-"

"Nick! Don't say that in front of the children!"

"What? All I said is, I like pink-"

"Nick!"

. . . with his customary flair and aplomb.

Packed everyone in the car.

"Not many things supercede a Star Wars marathon. But with the help of the Force . . ."

And took them all for . . .

"Ice cream!"

Which, of course, healed them all of The Scrouge of The Head Lice much faster than they would have otherwise.

"This was the best day ever, Daddy!"

"Well . . ."

* * *

 **Not exactly autobiographical, but close enough for anyone who's ever dealt with lice, right?**

 **Plus, I think, right in character.**

 **What do you think?**

 **And yes, that is Nick's showercap in the pic since you asked ;)**

 **Everybody appreciates feedback.**

 **Leave a review if you like.**


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